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While out shopping with me yesterday, Neighbour chatted about a seminar he’d been to over the weekend. It was by a Singaporean, about survival skills.

According to the Singaporean: in Singapore, soldiers are supplied with condoms in their “emergency kits”.

“Oh, I’m sure we know what THAT emergency is,” I interrupted Neighbour, grinning in what I thought to be a mischevious way. (Come to think of it, I may have looked more stupid/horny than mischevious.)

Neighbour spluttered at me to shut up and let him finish. (OK. Carry on.)

“He says ah, the condoms can hold up to 1 litre of water. ONE LITRE! Good for collecting water when lost in jungle, he said. They sell them in the military stores in Singapore, know?!”

Eeew! But condoms have spermicide on them – sperm Ridsect! I’ll drink spermicide-flavoured water only when truly desperate, thank you very much.

Or when they start marketing a spermicide-free condom, which will then be used by soldiers for collecting water, and everyone else for blow jobs.

“Hmm! I wonder if they’ll give us any condoms for National Service,” wondered Neighbour aloud.

I wouldn’t mind owning My First Condom, tee hee. And given by the government!! But I doubt it. The Planning People wouldn’t want to tempt the trainees, now, would they?

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